More Than Metal
by River2027
Summary: After Cameron saves his life once more, John begins to discover his true feelings for his Terminator protector and tries to prove to her--and himself--that she’s not just a machine. John/Cameron
1. Come With Me

**Terminator: the Sarah Connor Chronicles**

title: More than Metal

author: River2027

Disclaimer: I do not own anything Terminator

setting: season 2, sometime before "Earthlings Welcome Here"

genre: romance/drama/humor

rating: T

warning: contains spoilers for all episodes up to "complications"

summary: After Cameron saves his life once more, John begins to discover his true feelings for his Terminator protector and tries to prove to her--and himself--that she's not just a machine. John/Cameron

_author's note: Just something I'd written a while ago and thought I'd post while working on my other stories. I've posted a trailer for my "threequel" fanfiction on YouTube that you guys could check out: URL: http:// youtube .com/watch?v=sfMjjjuJeV4_

_**Come with Me if You Want to Live**_

_He had been so sure he was going to die. _

_There was Cromartie, his substitute teacher and Terminator assassin, holding a gun aimed at his head when the truck came out of nowhere, slamming into the machine with enough force that would have killed a human man instantly. _

_He had been in a state of shock when the truck suddenly reversed and Cameron Phillips threw the door open and spoke the words he knew, the words Uncle Bob had spoken. "Come with me if you want to live!"_

_He saw the bloodstains on her shirt from bullets that hadn't pierced human flesh. He didn't hesitate. When he climbed in, he knew nothing would ever be the same._

John struggled against the icy water, mind spinning, threatening to lose consciousness. Was Cromartie still here? Had his mother escaped? Where was Cameron? He could vaguely hear his uncle, Derek Reese, shouting his name from too far away.

John felt the last bit of air leave his lungs when a strong arm lifted him effortlessly out of the water by the collar of his shirt. He was coughing and sputtering when Cameron dragged him onto dry land once more. He saw his mother running towards him, face twisted with worry.

"John!" Sarah cried. "John, are you alright?"

John nodded, shivering violently from the icy water. "Yeah…I'm fine."

"Good," Derek said. He stood up quickly. "We need to find out where Cromartie went."

Sarah stood up and turned to Derek. Their voices faded as they walked up the hill to see if Cromartie was still nearby, waiting to ambush them again. Had he fallen in the water as well? Had he sunk again?

Cameron sat down next to him and brushed her hand across his forehead. John shivered at her touch, though that could also have been from the cold. Then Cameron did something totally unexpected. She put both arms around him and drew him into an awkward embrace.

"Wha-what…what are you doing?" John asked, voice quivering. He didn't mind the affection, but he just couldn't imagine his mother or Derek approving. In fact, they'd probably think she was trying to crush him to death. Especially Derek, who was engaged in some kind of personal war with Cameron.

"Your body temperature is dangerously low," Cameron stated in her normal mechanical tone. "I am helping to conserve your body heat so you will not freeze to death from hypothermia."

"Oh," John said. He felt a brief pang of hurt. It was practical. It would save his life…nothing more. She wasn't doing this out of some kind of love for him, just to keep him alive. Just to fulfill her mission objective. It meant nothing to her, right?

John sighed. He hadn't spoken to her in a friendly way in a while. He didn't hang out with her anymore. He spent time with Riley instead of her. He had expressed some…resentment for her ever since the car bomb. No wonder she felt nothing towards him. "When did I let things get so bad between us?"

"I don't know," came the reply. "You stopped being friendly when I informed you that you could not be trusted anymore."

John winced. "Yeah."

"Then you met Riley."

Was he hearing things in his feverish state or did he recognize _something_ in Cameron's tone? "Yeah."

"We stopped being friends," she stated simply.

John bit his lip. She didn't understand his feelings, of course, his need to break free and be the leader everyone expected him to be. She only saw things in black and white. No shades of grey. Just a few months ago, he would have taken the time to explain his thoughts to her.

"I'm sorry," he said finally. "For blowing up at you…for…everything that happened after that day. I…uh…I just needed to break free of my mother…and you…I guess. I thought I didn't need help anymore. If I'm the future leader of mankind, I have to grow a spine."

"You already have a spine," Cameron said. "It is unnecessary that you grow a secondary one."

John allowed himself a smile at her naivety. "No. Grow a spine means…become stronger, do things for myself, make decisions for myself. Become the leader I'm meant to be."

"Oh," Cameron said. _Wait for it_…John thought.

"Thank you for explaining," she added predictably. "But Future John isn't strong all the time either. He needs help. He has friends."

John shivered against her shoulder. He remembered when she'd said that to him before.

"In the future you have many friends," Cameron repeated.

"So you've said. But I think I have followers, not friends."

Cameron cocked her head. "Your friends would be willing to die for you."

"Just because you're willing to die for someone doesn't mean you love them!" John exploded. The instant it left his mouth, he realized how untrue it was.

"Yes it does," Cameron corrected instantly.

"Who?" John demanded. "Who would actually take a bullet for me? Who cares that much about John Connor?"

Cameron met his gaze. "I do. So does Sarah. Even Derek. Kyle Reese. Martin Bedell. Allison Young. Everyone."

_He died for you…We all die for you…_

John felt his fever taking hold again.

She'd die for him. She'd proved that. He knew that.

He was beginning to realize that he felt the same way.

No matter how irrational or illogical it was.

He'd die for her too.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

_Author's note: Everyone have fun tonight! Can't wait!_


	2. You Seem Different

_Author's note: Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter!_

_Shaty – Yes, I'm continuing it; it's a multi chapter fic. Glad you liked the video. I had a better version that was a whole lot smoother but I couldn't upload it to YouTube. So, yeah, I know it's a little choppy._

_RubyFresh – No, you've never told me, but thanks for the compliment! I _love _inserting Firefly references, so I'm glad you like them too. There's actually a couple more in the later chapters. :)_

_**You Seem Different**_

"_She's in."_

_He'd watched the laptop as images flashed, holding his breath. A small part of him doubted that Cameron could do it. A small part of him agreed with Derek, that she could essentially create Skynet. _

_He hated that part of himself._

_He'd sighed in relief when he finally saw that she had succeeded. Derek had calmly reached over and plucked the chip out of the port. John scrambled to his feet, heart thumping wildly as he saw his uncle studying the chip, as if contemplating if he should throw it under the wheels of a passing car._

"_Derek, don't," he choked out, eyeing the chip. What Derek held in his hand __was the essence, the very life of Cameron. Her core. The irreplaceable part._

"_I want you to hear this in no uncertain terms," Derek said, holding up the chip. "Someday one of these things is gonna kill you."_

_John reached out, eyes filled with confidence, and plucked the chip from his uncle's grip. "It's not gonna be this one."_

John tiredly stepped out of their beat up jeep and headed to the door, almost falling when his vision blurred. Cameron caught him by the arm. Sarah looked at him worriedly.

"John, are you sure you're alright?" she asked.

"It's just a fever," he replied. "I'll be fine."

Derek slammed his car door and came over and grabbed John's arm, telling Cameron to let go. She did obediently, with a look of confusion on her face.

"Derek, what are you doing?" John asked.

"I'm keeping you away from it," Derek replied, glaring behind him at Cameron.

John scowled. "She's not going to hurt me. She's programmed to protect me."

"Sometimes they go bad," Derek said with a purposeful look at Cameron. "No one knows why."

Cameron seemed to react to his words, and John glanced at his uncle. "Who told you that?"

"She did," Derek replied, nodding towards Cameron. "You've grown too attached to it. It's not a person, remember? It's a machine. Metal. Nothing more."

John maintained an angry silence.

Derek shook his head in disbelief. "See what I mean?" he said to Sarah. "He's already too close to it."

"I have to be close to John," Cameron spoke up. "I must be able to protect him."

"But you get inside his head!" Derek sputtered. "He thinks of you as a human girl!"

"Reese!" Sarah said, voice ringing with finality. She looked to Cameron. "Why don't you go to your room?"

Cameron cast a long look at John before heading down the hall. Derek gave a dry laugh.

"Like it even needs a room," he muttered. "It doesn't sleep!"

John yanked his grip free from his uncle's. "Would you stop it?" he demanded. "I know what she is! Yes, she's a machine! I know what you've told me, but it's not gonna be her. Not her. She won't betray me. She's one of our allies! One of your allies!"

"She's a machine," Derek shot back. "She doesn't have a soul and she never will."

John's mouth dropped open at the familiar words. He'd said them to placate his mother and uncle. Cameron had heard his words, he knew that much. He couldn't have imagined what she'd been thinking then.

Derek continued staring and John gritted his teeth and turned around, heading to his room. He found Cameron standing just outside her bedroom, close enough to have heard everything. She'd heard what Derek had said. Could Terminator's feelings be hurt? Provided that they even _had _feelings.

"I'm sorry about Derek," he said to her.

"It's not just Derek," Cameron replied. "It's everyone. You said," she switched to John's voice. "'she doesn't have a soul and she never will'. I believe you are correct."

John winced at hearing his own words. He wasn't even sure he believed them anymore.

Cameron turned to walk away.

"You've expressed emotions before," John called after her, tone almost accusing. "Back when we first time jumped, you…" He blushed. "Well, you touched my neck…"

Cameron turned to stare at him, face devoid of any emotion. "I was taking a scan of your pulse and stress levels. There was nothing emotional about it."

John flinched as if she's slapped him.

_Do you lie to me?_

_Sometimes._

For the first time in his life, he prayed she was lying to him now.

*****

John brushed his teeth dutifully in the bathroom, with Cameron standing in the doorway, keeping watch. He sighed. "You don't have to keep watching me," he reminded her. "I'm not in danger anymore." He sneezed violently.

"You have a cold," Cameron stated. "You need cared for. I'll make you pancakes if you want."

John cracked a smile. "No…I don't want pancakes."

"Hot chocolate?" she suggested.

"No, Cam," John said. "I just…want to sit and relax, watch a movie or something."

"What would you like to watch?" she asked.

He had to check his thoughts. She was acting so…_human. _Saying things his mother would say, things someone who truly cared for him would say. Maybe he'd been right earlier, when he said she expressed emotion. She certainly seemed to care about him. More than a machine? Maybe…

Movie…what movie did he want? "How about…"

Before he could finish, he saw Cameron jerk her head up and look down the hall towards the front door. "Someone is coming."

Hypersensitive hearing. _Must be nice_. John heard a knock on the door about five seconds later and heard his mother answer it. "John!" she yelled down the hall. "It's Riley!"

John had been staring at Cameron and he saw…literally _saw _her face fall. The light in her eyes was gone.

Human reaction.

"Cameron," he began.

"I will go to my room," she stated. "I will refrain from any violent behavior towards your new friend. I promise I will not kill her."

John felt flustered. "Well…that's good…but…"

"John!" Sarah yelled again.

John hesitated. Riley or Cameron? Who did he want to spend time with tonight? The machine who could never return his affections, or the real live human girl who had taken a liking to him? John glanced at Cameron's crestfallen face. She'd stayed put, hanging onto his last word.

"But what?" she asked.

"But…tell her I'm not feeling well," he said. "I don't want company tonight."

She didn't smile, but she did look content when she walked down the hall to the doorway where Riley waited.

Riley looked a little confused that Cameron was answering the door instead of John. "I'm here to see John."

Cameron didn't move to let her in. "John is ill. He needs to rest and does not wish to have company. It will disturb his sleeping patterns."

Riley frowned. She'd always thought John's sister was weird, but this was new. "If he's sick, then he should have his girlfriend by his side."

"John doesn't have a girlfriend," Cameron replied bluntly.

Riley looked a bit taken aback. "Then what would you call me?"

"Riley," Cameron replied emotionlessly.

Riley frowned. "What are you talking about?"

Cameron stared hard at Riley. "You should leave. It's not safe for you here."

"Are you…threatening me?" Riley asked, stunned.

"Yes," Cameron replied bluntly.

"Cameron!" Sarah shouted.

Cameron looked up to see Sarah coming back over. "Riley wishes to disturb John while he's sleeping."

Riley's mouth dropped open. "No! I was just…I just wanted to…" She trailed off when John's mother turned to stare at her.

"I think it might be a good idea if you would go home tonight," she said. Her tone was polite, but there was no mistaking the underlying message. Riley finally decided that seeing John tonight wasn't worth the trouble, no matter how sick he was.

Cameron watched, feeling a bit of satisfaction, as Riley turned and walked back down the driveway, looking defeated.

Sarah glared at Cameron as she closed the door. "You can't go around threatening people."

"John made me promise not to kill Riley," Cameron replied. "He never said I was forbidden to threaten her."

"Well, I'm telling you," Sarah said.

"I take orders from John," Cameron said.

"If John told you to jump off a bridge would you?"

"Yes," Cameron replied automatically. "Though I don't know of any good that would come from such an order. It is highly unlikely that I will be severely damaged in the fall. Also I would be unable to protect John if a Terminator were to show up on the bridge if I was jumping from it. I can't fly."

"Really?" Sarah asked sarcastically. "I'll keep that in mind." she sighed, putting a hand to her head. "Just…go to bed."

"I don't sleep," Cameron replied. "I cannot 'go to bed'."

"Fine. Go to your room and do not bother John unless he needs something," Sarah ordered.

Cameron obediently went down the hall and turned into John's room.

******

_John stared at her, the pretty girl who had saved his life. Twice. The one who ended up being a Terminator from the future sent to protect him from getting assassinated. _

_Cameron Phillips._

_"What model are you?" he asked, looking her over. "Are you new? You seem…" he hesitated. "Different."_

_She smiled slightly, seeming so human as she reached over and plucked a potato chip out of his bag. "I am," she said simply, popping the chip into her mouth._

_It wasn't until later he would find out the true extent of her meaning._

John was lying on his kid-sized bed thinking about how unfair it was that Cameron got the queen sized if she didn't even use it. He sat up when Cameron entered his room, yanking his headphones off his ears.

"Sarah says that if you do not need anything, I must go to my room," she said.

John glanced around. Did he need anything? "I could use some company."

Cameron walked over to sit upright on the edge of his bed. "What would you like me to do?"

John was silent, staring into his lap. "Why was it you? Why were you the one I sent back in time? Why'd I pick you?"

"You didn't," Cameron replied easily. "I volunteered."

John looked up, confused. "Wait…what?" _Volunteered? _Could Terminators do that? He let his Terminators _volunteer _in the future?

"There were several reprogrammed Terminators in the Connor Camp," Cameron explained. "You spent time with us, talked to us. Just making conversation. Some were too primitive to understand. I went on many missions for John Connor. He considered me a friend, even though several of his underlings didn't appreciate it."

"Derek?" John asked.

"Yes," Cameron agreed. "Your uncle never did like the fact that you reprogrammed Terminators. One day, you asked if anyone would volunteer to go back and protect your younger self."

John felt his words catch in his throat. "And you…"

Cameron stared at him. "I want you safe."

"Because of him," John deduced. "Future John."

"Yes. Future John."

John smiled. "He knew you'd volunteer. He knew you had emotions, were more developed than the others…" his voice trailed off. "…different."

"Yes. I am different."

"I know," John whispered softly. Cameron remained sitting upright at the end of his bed and John was starting to feel a little uncomfortable.

"Do you have to do that?"

"Do what?" she asked, not comprehending.

"Sit like that."

"How would you prefer I sit?"

"I don't know…relax a little. I can't sleep with you sitting there like that."

"I can leave."

"No!" John sputtered quickly, perhaps too quickly. "No, you don't have to go. Don't go."

He shivered involuntarily. _Maybe I really do have a cold_, he thought. Cameron came around and lay down next to him on the bed. John was a little uncomfortable for a moment, but he soon discovered it was much easier to sleep with her so close… keeping him safe.

_No where is safe. _He heard his mother's voice in his head. He agreed with it. Nowhere….

Except here.

He fell asleep quickly, hoping his mom or Derek didn't come into his room in the morning.

________________________________________________________________________________________________

_author's note: The last scene with Cam lying down on his bed I actually wrote before "Mr Fergusen is Ill Today." So it was kind of cool to see a similar scene in that episode. Anyway, happy Friday "Terminator" night! :)_


	3. I'll Make Pancakes

_**I'll Make Pancakes**_

_John Connor walked through the newly rebuilt Connor Camp. The machines had not found them yet, though John was sure it wouldn't be long now._

_"It's almost time for school," Cameron said._

_John nodded. He still had young soldiers to train further. He turned to Cameron. "Would you be willing to make pancakes for the entire camp?"_

_"What entire camp?"_

_"The resistance," John replied. _Isn't that obvious?

_"You want me to make a pancake for every person in the human resistance?"_

_"If you don't mind," John said. Cameron looked thoughtful._

_"I don't mind. I hope Sarah has enough Bisquick."_

_She walked off leaving John confused. His mother had died of cancer years ago. Was Cameron suffering a relapse? Or was there another Sarah in his camp that he didn't know about?_

_John went about his daily activities, making sure the Tin Cans couldn't find the hideout, prepping the weapons. As he finished, John looked around and was shocked to see his mother, Sarah Connor, walking towards him. She seemed angry, which was weird, since she should be dead…_

"John," Sarah's stern voice snapped John back into consciousness. His eyes flew open. His mother looked mad. And then he remembered what had happened last night. Cameron lying down next to him… _Crap, _John thought. _She knows. She saw. I'm dead. Is Cameron still asleep? No, stupid, she doesn't sleep, remember?_

"Do you want to explain this?" Sarah asked.

"Uh, well, let me think…" John said. "Where's Cameron?"

Sarah frowned. "Where's Cameron? She's downstairs making you pancakes."

"Huh?"

Sarah frowned. "You didn't tell her to?"

"No, why would I want pancakes? All you _ever_ make is pancakes."

Sarah ignored John's words. "Well, Tin Miss is down making you enough pancakes to last a lifetime because she claims you told her to make pancakes for the entire resistance."

John sat up in his bed. Sure enough Cameron was no longer in his room. Had she heard his dream? Oh crap, had he been talking in his sleep? His dream suddenly made perfect sense being spliced with reality.

He leaped out of bed and rushed down the hall, screaming, "Cameron!"

As he entered the kitchen, Cameron looked up from where she was mixing up yet another batch of pancakes. "Yes?"

John stared, bewildered. She already had three serving plates stacked with pancakes, a batch on the griddle, and batter she was currently mixing. "What are you doing?!"

"I'm making pancakes for the resistance," she answered in a matter-of-fact tone.

"But…why?!"

"You told me to," Cameron replied calmly.

"No, I didn't," John said, gritting his teeth. "I was talking in my sleep. I didn't mean it." He looked at the pancakes. "How many were you going to make?!"

"One for each member of the resistance," Cameron said. "plus one for Sarah since she would have felt left out. I also made one for myself." She scanned the piles of pancakes she'd already made. "I only have a hundred and twenty seven more to make."

"No," John said, reaching over and grabbing the bowl of batter from her. "You're done."

"You don't want pancakes anymore?"

"No," John said gritting his teeth. "And in case you didn't notice, there are only four of us here, not the entire resistance."

"I know," Cameron said. "I did find it odd that you wished to feed an army that does not exist yet, but Sarah told me to make sure you had whatever you needed. You told me to make pancakes."

John rubbed the bridge of his nose. "This is not happening to me…"

To make matters worse, Derek entered the kitchen. "I smell pancakes…again?" He glared at Sarah, who simply held up her hands.

"Don't look at me."

Derek spotted Cameron standing over the griddle. "_You _made these," he asked.

Cameron stared at him. "I made you one too."

Derek laughed humorlessly, staring at the piles. "You made me _one?" _

Cameron scooped two fresh pancakes onto a plate and held it out to Derek. "You can have mine too. I don't require nourishment."

Derek kept staring no matter how fruitless it was. John sighed. His uncle couldn't accept the fact that no one can win a staring competition against a Terminator. Cameron had just done the nicest thing she could for Derek, offering him her pancake, and his uncle wouldn't accept it. Finally Derek got fed up and smacked the plate out of Cameron's hand. She didn't even flinch as it shattered on the floor and the two pancakes flopped onto the ground.

Derek glared over at John and Sarah. "I wouldn't eat any of these," he said. He looked back at Cameron. "Tin can probably poisoned them." He turned and stalked off. John glanced at Cameron, who was staring at the pancake on the floor.

"He wasted my pancake," she said.

John winced. "You can have mine," he said.

Cameron smiled—_smiled—_at him. "Thank you. You can have Allison's since she's not born yet."

No matter how weird the situation was, John felt he couldn't stay angry at Cameron, despite the mess he'd have to clean up.

************

_She'd listened intently when he ranted about his mother forgetting his birthday. "Do I have a birthday?" John had been taken aback. Of course she didn't, he knew that. But neither did he want to tell her that. It seemed wrong somehow to crush her hopes. "I don't know," he replied thoughtfully. "Were you born?"_

"_I was built."_

_John rubbed the back of his neck, feeling a little awkward. "Well, then maybe you have a built day." She'd seemed content with that. _

_His birthday. It was supposed to be a day to remember. _

_He had no idea how true that would be._

He had gotten to school late and decided to skip English altogether. In fact, he decided he was going to skip the entire school day. He just couldn't deal with it, and he couldn't face Riley yet either. She'd wonder why he hadn't wanted to see her last night. _Sorry Riley, I decided to spend the night with my metal protector. _That would go over well.

Cameron was outside patrolling the school, as usual, but he knew she'd find him if he started wandering off. Good. He wanted her to. Sure enough, it took her under two minutes to pinpoint his location.

John smiled as he saw her approach. "I knew you'd find me."

Cameron glanced around, probably scanning for any potential threats. "Are you playing hooky?"

John cracked a smile. "Yeah."

"This is not a wise idea. Absence—."

"Gets me on the radar, yeah I know," John finished irritably. "I don't need you going around quoting my mother."

"Sarah Connor is a reliable source for quoting," Cameron replied unabashed. "In the future, you like to be reminded of the things she said."

John looked away, drawing a shaky breath. "That's because in the future she's…dead."

Cameron was silent for a moment, before asking. "Why are we playing hooky?"

John shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe I just wanted to get out…do something. You know? Celebrate."

Cameron cocked her head again. "Celebrate what?"

"My birthday, I guess."

"Your birthday was two weeks and four days ago…" she recited mechanically.

"I know, but I didn't really get to celebrate," John said. His tone soured. "On my birthday, I saw my father as a six year old, you got blown up in a car, I killed the guy who did it, you went rogue and tried to kill me, I got into two car accidents, was nearly killed, then received a confession of love from my terminator protector who was trying to kill me, and I reactivated you despite the protests of my mother and uncle. And at the same time, Cromartie killed twenty FBI agents because of me. Oh yeah, and I got a haircut."

"Your new haircut is tight," Cameron said.

"If that's your way of cheering me up, it's not working," John replied.

Cameron remained quiet for a brief second. "Was that bad to say?"

"What?"

"That I loved you."

John shifted uncomfortably. "Yes. It's not something you just…say. It means something. Do you even know what love is?"

"Yes," Cameron replied. "Love is an intense feeling of deep affection; a deep romantic attachment to someone; to like very much."

She was quoting the dictionary again. John sighed. "But do you know, truly know."

Cameron actually hesitated. "I don't know."

John felt some hope rise with her human reaction.

"On your birthday, I was supposed to get you cake," she said.

John held up a hand. "It's okay, Cam, really. That wasn't your fault."

She cocked her head to regard him. "I didn't get you anything."

"I know," John said. "I didn't have a party. Or a real birthday. For my birthday I had an ice cream cone."

Cameron pulled out a wad of cash. "Let's celebrate your birthday."

John's eyes widened. "Where'd you get all that cash?"

"I've been saving it," she replied. "For a time when we could celebrate your birthday."

John was touched, truly. "You've been waiting all this time?"

"Your sixteenth birthday is supposed to be memorable," Cameron replied. "It is an important milestone. Usually comes with a car. I didn't have enough money for a car and Sarah specifically ordered me not to steal anything else…"

John smiled, holding up a hand. "Cameron…"

She looked up. "Besides, we already have a car. And you don't even have a license. Where would you like to go?"

John frowned thoughtfully. "How about bowling or something. Then we can get dinner and a movie."

He looked up to see what she thought of his suggestion.

She smiled. "Let's go have some fun."

________________________________________________________________________________________________

_author's note: Hope you all enjoyed it. And don't forget to show support for Season Three! Tonight's episode rocked and Cameron kicks some serious butt. We _need _another season. _


	4. I Can Feel

_**author's note: **Thanks again to everyone who's been following this story! Your reviews mean a lot._

_Emphaty Turtle - I am in _no _way killing the _I love you _scene. You'll see in the later chapters. :) I'm with you. I firmly believe Cameron was telling the truth and that she loves John. Don't worry, I'm definitely not killing the scene, in fact it plays a huge part in my last chapter. :)_

_**I Can Feel**_

"_What are you doing?"_

_Her behavior was bizarre, beyond bizarre...for a machine. Sticking her foot out the window to feel the breeze was a human thing, something she shouldn't be able to experience._

"_Feeling what it's like to get away from it all," she had replied._

_He had shaken his head. It was impossible, right? _Feeling _wasn't something they could do. "I don't think you are," he told her. "If by feel you mean emotion, I'm pretty sure you still don't have any."_

_Sure, she could _fake _emotion. She could _say _things, she could _say _that she loved him, but it didn't really mean anything. "And if by feel you mean what it feels like to have the wind blow through you toes or your hair…I'm pretty sure you can't feel that either."_

"_I don't think you understand how we work," she'd replied. He had watched as she lifted a hand in front of her face. "I have sensation. I feel." She stuck her hand outside the window, letting the wind blow against it. Then she'd turned her piercing gaze back on him._

"_I wouldn't be worth much if I couldn't feel."_

_For a moment he could have sworn he read something in her eyes. What kind of feeling did she mean? Sensation? Emotion? _Can you feel love?

_She looked back out the window and he continued to stare straight ahead at the road, his thoughts running wild._

John tightened up the laces on his bowling shoes before standing up and glancing around the dimly lit alley. "Do you know how to play?" he asked.

Cameron was silent, probably searching memory databanks. "I have not played bowling before."

"Alright," John said, grabbing a ball. "I'll show you." He took her wrist and pulled her up to stand in front of the lane.

"Just stand here, like this," he said. He then put the ball in her hands.

"It's light," she commented.

John rolled his eyes. _Metal. _"Alright, now just draw back and let it go…gently. Try to knock over all the pins."

Cameron stared at the lane, probably doing some mental calculations, John figured. She drew back and released the ball perfectly. It rolled down and crashed into the center.

Perfect strike.

John tried to conceal the surprise on his face. "Nice job," he said. Cameron picked up another bowling ball as John stepped up to bowl. He paused, trying to gauge the best angle before releasing, causing a split.

He scowled. "Great," he muttered. He glanced over at Cameron. "Hey, hand me that ball, will you?"

Cameron tossed the bowling ball toward him and John's eyes widened. His attempt to catch it failed and the ball smacked onto the floor with a tremendous thud. Several other bowling families jumped at the sound, staring at John with annoyance.

John hastily picked it up. "You…can't throw it!" he hissed.

"Sorry," Cameron replied. John sighed and bowled again, knocking down one pin, but not the other. Cameron seemed to be observing his reactions.

They continued for the rest of the game. Cameron didn't bowl any more strikes, and John ended up winning by four points. He felt a bit of pride as he returned the bowling shoes and the employee asked him who had won their game. "I did," John said.

The employee laughed. "You didn't let the lady win?"

"No," Cameron said. "I let him win."

"What?" The pride drained from John's posture, because he knew it could very well be true. He _had_ wondered why she'd missed the strikes, being a highly sophisticated computer and all. "Why?"

"Human males are extremely competitive," Cameron stated. The employee laughed again and John felt a little dejected. Beat by a girl…sure she's a cyborg who's as tough as nuclear nails and could play baseball with a Terminator's head…but still…a girl…right?

"Alright, Cam," he said. "If you're so good, let's see how you do at some other games. This time, don't let me win."

****************

"Putt Putt golf," John announced, paying for the two tickets and handing Cameron a club and a purple golf ball. "The object: Get the ball into the hole in the least amount of hits possible."

Cameron nodded and John showed her how to hold the club. She released and swung lightly, the ball arching perfectly to land directly in the hole. "Hole in one," Cameron stated. He could have sworn he heard a smugness in her tone. "Your turn."

John's mouth had dropped open. _I'm gonna lose again…_He putted, missing the hole by an inch.

Cameron watched him interestedly. "Are you sure you don't want me to let you win?"

John shot her a sly look. "No, I have a plan."

His plan, whatever it had been, failed.

Cameron scored a hole in one for all sixteen holes. John racked his brain, trying to think of a sport where mathematics or computer technology would not give her an advantage.

Nothing was coming to mind.

*****************

"Paintball," John announced. "It's not only fun, but it's a good training exercise too. You simply run through the course, hiding and ducking, trying to shoot the members of the opposing team."

"Sounds like what you do in the resistance," Cameron stated.

John had to agree. "Yeah, that's probably similar. Except that paintballs don't kill. They may sting, but they don't severely injure."

"Good," Cameron said. "Sarah would be very angry if you got hurt while playing games under my watch."

"Probably," John agreed, picking up his paintball gun and handing one to Cameron. _Now if only we could find someone to play against. _He really didn't feel like taking on Cameron in a solo paintball mission. He'd get slaughtered.

Just then he spotted a group of five college-aged guys entering the course. Since John and Cameron were the only other people there, the guys headed straight for them.

"Hey there, little man," one said to John. "Who's your friend?"

Cameron didn't answer.

The guy looked annoyed. "You guys don't look so tough. Let's go."

"I can kill you with my brain," Cameron stated bluntly. John shot a glance at her, wondering for a fraction of a second if that was actually true. The college guy chalked it up to false bravado.

"That's pretty funny," he said. "Let's see if your trigger finger is as fast as your mouth."

John snorted. "Fine," he said. "Let's go. We'll massacre you."

The guys laughed. "Alright, well bring it on, little man," the leader said. They headed into the course to take positions.

John smiled as he loaded his weapon. This was going to be fun.

"Five on two," he said to Cameron. "That's not very fair."

Cameron nodded. "For them…"

John quickly took her by the wrist and they ducked behind an old tire. "Okay, where are they?"

Cameron poked her head up and scanned the surroundings for their opponents heat signatures. "Two by the tree, one behind the bale of hay, one near the entrance, one army crawling towards us."

John cocked his rifle. "How many can you take?"

"All of them," Cameron replied quickly.

John sighed. _Stupid question. _"Let me have at least two," he protested.

"You can have the two by the tree," Cameron replied.

"Deal," John said. "Cover me."

He ran out, diving behind another bale of hay, hearing shots ring out and paintballs whiz past his head. He heard a howl of pain as one of Cameron's shots nicked an unmasked opponent in his ear. As John crawled towards the tree, he heard two more shots go off and saw the two other college guys groaning, one having been hit in the cheek, the other in the neck.

"They're lucky," John whispered to himself. "I forget to tell her not to blind them."

He spotted the two that had taken refuge behind the tree. One was staring at his fallen companions with wide eyes. "This chic is nuts!" he exclaimed. "And she's a perfect shot! Hasn't even missed once!"

John pulled the trigger, two paintballs hitting his opponent's chest, another hitting his hand. John rolled as the other guy shot at him, one clipping his jacket. He stood up, shooting off two more paintballs into the last one's chest, causing him to stumble.

"Surrender," John ordered. The guy obediently dropped his gun and John kicked it away into the brush. He smiled at the leader. "I told you we'd massacre you."

He turned away and headed back towards the exit. As he moved, he heard the leader scramble for his gun, but just as he turned back around, another shot rang out and the leader dropped the gun, holding his hand and cursing. John glanced right to see Cameron, lowering her weapon.

He grinned and waved her over.

"That was fun," she said. He had to agree. It was much more fun working with her than trying to beat her. It was petty, he realized that now.

"I'm sorry I beat you at golf," she said.

John shook his head, smiling. "Nah, it's fine. You deserved to win."

They walked back out to the jeep and Cameron climbed into the driver's seat. "Are we going to a movie now?" she asked.

John checked his watch. It was only five. They still had plenty of time. So far, this had turned out to be the best birthday ever. He grinned at her again.

"Yeah. Let's go."


	5. You're a Machine

_**Chapter Five:**_

_**You're A Machine**_

_"You were with Riley," she'd stated. He could see the disproval on her face, but he hadn't cared. Why was it any of her business? He could do whatever he wanted; she wasn't in charge of his life, no one was. _

_He'd stormed up the stairs and closed the door, catching a glimpse of her face once more. Hurt, even jealousy. It reminded him of something his mother had told him, back when he'd first brought Riley home, right before they'd disappeared into his room._

_He hadn't know what Cameron was doing at the time. Truth be told, he hadn't really cared. His mother had later recalled to him the story, as confused by it as he was. She said Cameron had sat down at the table and watched him, whatever that meant. In fact, Sarah had said that she had almost appeared..._

_Jealous. _

_Why would Cameron be jealous of him and Riley? Why would she care that he'd been out late? Even as he thought the words, he knew the answer. _Because she wasn't lying to you, _he told himself._

I love you John and you love me!

_She was right, at least about one part. He did love her; he'd just been trying desperately to deny it, because it wasn't possible. So he'd brushed her off, brushed off her concern, her questions, her love._

_How could he have done that to her? He slid down onto the floor, leaning back against the door and closing his eyes. He'd just done it again. He'd pushed her away._

_And he felt absolutely horrible. _

*********

John shook off his memories, trying to focus on the list of movies playing in the theater.

"How about this one?" Cameron asked, pointing at one randomly.

"That's rated R," John said. "You know what that means right?"

"Restricted," Cameron replied. "Minors are not allowed access. Am I a minor?"

John raised his eyebrows at her. "Yes."

"I do not have an 'age' as you do," Cameron explained.

"But you're made to look like a sixteen or seventeen year old girl," John said. "You're in high school."

"Right," Cameron said. She pointed to another one. "What about this one?"

John curled his lip at the suggestion. "We can't go see that. It's a chick flick."

"Chick flick?" Cameron repeated.

John paused to explain. "It's a movie for girls."

"Then it's adequate," Cameron said. "I'm a girl."

"Yeah, but, it's not something girls watch with guys," John amended. "I mean, I guess sometimes, they do…"

"Great," Cameron said. "So let's see one."

She started into the theater and he let out a heavy sigh. Well, if it's what she wanted… "Oh fine…"

************

Cameron had watched the movie intently, which didn't really surprise John. She was always intent, focused. He did notice her cock her head at the part where the couple was dancing in the park, when they kissed.

When they left, John searched the restaurants nearby for a nice place to eat. "I like Olive Garden," he said. "Good Italian food. And breadsticks."

Cameron nodded. "I will eat whatever you want."

John felt a little nervous when they were finally seated. This was the first time he'd ever been on a date…a real dinner date. He had figured his first would be with Riley, but he was no longer sure what he felt about her. It was nothing compared to what he felt when he was around Cameron.

Cameron sat across from him, studying her menu. "You don't have to buy me anything," she said. "I don't need to eat."

John shrugged. "Yeah, but if you don't eat, you'll look like a freak and I'll look like a pig. Just pick something." His eyes widened as he spotted the prices. "Actually, you know what? I think we should split something. One dish is plenty big enough for two."

Cameron consented and John ordered for the two of them. While they waited, he tapped his knuckles on the table, trying to think of what conversation he could make.

"I lied to you before," Cameron spoke up. "I should apologize. I do feel emotions. I feel fear, frustration, pain, hurt, confusion, pride, anger, and joy."

John frowned. "Why don't you ever show that?"

"I do," Cameron replied.

"Not around me," John said.

"Would you like me to?"

"I mean…that's part of who you are," John sighed. "The whole…emotionless thing, but I wouldn't mind being able to read when you're actually happy. Or angry."

"I don't think I've ever been angry with you," Cameron informed.

"Not even when I was with Riley?" John asked, half-hoping she _had _been.

She burst his bubble of hope. "No. I was not angry. I was…" she hesitated. "…something else. I can't explain."

"Wait…" John felt light-headed. "Cam…were you…jealous?"

"Yes," she admitted blatantly. "That seems like a proper term for it."

"I knew you could feel emotions," John said. He smiled. "I saw it in your eyes…when you thought you were Allison."

Cameron didn't react to the name like he thought she would. "I'm not Allison. You told me that."

John pursed his lips. "I know."

She stayed still, simply staring into his eyes. He had seen her emotions. He had seen the hurt beneath her eyes when he told her to drop him off to see Riley. He had seen the confusion in her eyes when he told her she was a machine from the future, not Palmdale. He'd seen the fear and desperation in her when she was begging for her life. He'd seen the joy when she played foosball.

He'd seen her emotions.

But he'd never seen this one.

The look that mirrored the one he'd just seen in that stupid chick flick she'd made him sit through. The look that the girl gave to the man she loved and longed to be with.

Longing.

Longing to be human.

The waiter set their food down and John took a bite, watching as Cameron did the same. How could he feel this way about a piece of technology? Even as he thought the words, he cursed himself for thinking of her like that. She had to be more than that. She _had _to be more than metal.

They could simulate love. Vick had done that. Vick had been married and Barbara had not seen through it. From the clips John had seen, Vick hadn't even shown much emotion, but he must have convinced Barbara.

Cameron's words still haunted him. "_She would not be the first human to be fooled by a machine." _She had no idea.

But where Vick showed no emotion, Cameron could if she wanted to. Did that make her more advanced, more capable of feeling? Did she have a program to feel emotions? Was it awakened in the car bomb?

He didn't have the nerve to ask her any of his questions. They simply ate in near complete silence.

***********

_He'd been scouring the city for her, desperately wondering where she would have gone. Was her chip malfunctioning again? What had happened to her in the supermarket? Why hadn't she come home?_

_He entered the halfway house arcade and spotted her, sighing internally with relief. She wasn't hurt, she was…he frowned. Was she laughing? Cameron? He simply stared at her for a moment, dumbfounded, watching the joy on her face as she played foosball. It was so _real, _so utterly human. _

_Finally the girl she was with, probably that Jody person, left the fooseball table and John quickly walked over to Cameron._

"_What are you doing?" he demanded._

_She raised her eyebrows at him, as if it were obvious. "Playing foosball."_

"_We have to go," John insisted. _

"_Go?" she asked, seeming confused. "Go where?"_

_Where do you think? "Home," he said, clenching his jaw._

"_Home?" Cameron repeated questioningly. "Who are you?"_

_The words stung. How could she not know him? It's me, John! John Connor! John Baum! He felt helpless. _

"_Cameron…" he began._

_Cameron had stared at him suspiciously. "My name's Allison."_

_Who's Allison? "No, it's not it's Cameron," he said through gritted teeth. Can Terminators get amnesia? Did she fall and hit her head in the grocery store? Why had she looked so human playing pool? _

"_I don't have time to explain…" he began. "We have to go."_

"_You're freaking me out," she said, taking a half step away._

_John leveled his gaze at her. "I'm freaking you out?" You're freaking me out! What happened to you?_

_Cameron was staring at him through fearful eyes and he felt a pang of sadness. "Do you really not know who you are?" _

"_I'm Allison," she explained adamantly. "From Palmdale."_

_John ground his teeth in frustration. "You're not Allison. You're not from Palmdale, you're from the future. You're a machine." _

_Her eyes widened. "A what?"_

_Machine. You're a machine. Metal. Tin Miss. Terminator. "You're chip's messed up again, but I can fix you. I fixed you once remember?" Please let me fix you…_

"_Fix me?" Cameron demanded. "Why would you fix me?"_

_Because…I need you…_

"_We have to go," he said, grabbing her wrist. Cameron struggled, yanking her hand free._

"_Did-did you hurt me?" she asked, eyes wide with fear. John felt stunned. Hurt her? Why would she think that? He'd die first._

_Jody suddenly came up, looking suspicious. "Who are you?"_

"_I'm her brother," John tried to explain. "John Baum."_

"_I don't have a brother," Cameron said, slowly shaking her head._

_John had enough. He didn't know what was wrong with her, but he had to get her out of here. He stepped forward to grab her, hoping she wouldn't remember that she could snap him like a twig._

_She reacted instinctively, her simple shove slamming him back against the wall. Jody's eyes widened and John stared at Cameron, stunned. The manager calmly walked over and ordered John to leave. John kept staring at Cameron, watched the flash of fear and anger on her face, as he was led out the door._

_He cast a glance back inside before he was shoved out. He wasn't finished yet. He would get her back. He had to get her back, he had to fix her, he had to make her remember._

I'll never abandon you, _he thought. _I'll be back.

_************_

After their dinner, John had driven them to the park, unaware that there was some kind of bonfire dance going on. John looked over at Cameron. "Do you dance?"

"I was programmed with over forty different styles of—."

John held up a hand to stop her. "A simple 'yes' would work."

"Oh," Cameron said. "In the future I will try to remember--."

He interrupted her again. "No, don't. That's who you are. That's what makes you a person."

Cameron cocked her head. "I'm not a person."

"You're not _human. _You're still a person. You're different. You're more than just a machine."

Cameron didn't reply and John glanced around at the other couples dancing near the fire. "Would you like to dance?"

Cameron put her hand in his. "This was in the movie," she stated.

"Yeah," John said, wondering if she picked up on the implications of it. He led her into the center of the park with the other dancers.

She was exceptionally graceful, though he shouldn't have been surprised. Sarah had told him how Cameron had infiltrated the ballet school…and Derek later related how he'd seen her dancing in her room for no apparent reason. If that wasn't human, John didn't know what was.

The song came to an end, but neither let go. John was caught completely off-guard when Cameron leaned in toward him and pressed her lips against his. He felt like his entire nervous system had shut down. Cameron pulled back almost as soon as she had started, leaving John's brain still trying to play catch up.

"What…" he stuttered. "What was that?"

"I don't know," Cameron replied. "Just seemed like something I should do."

That hurt John more than anything she'd said to him before. She hadn't kissed because she _felt _anything towards him. She'd seen it in the movie and recreated it. Learned sign of affection. Forget the fact that John was still entranced by the entirely _human _feel of it. His heart was still beating too fast and he was afraid she'd pick up on it.

"You don't kiss just…because," he attempted to explain. "You kiss because you want to. Because you love the other person…truly and completely."

Cameron stared right at him, right into him. "I know."

But she didn't truly, he knew that deep down. She'd told him yesterday that she wasn't completely sure what love was. That wouldn't have changed.

Unless spending the day with him sparked something.

Was that even possible?

She lied to him still. She could be lying now.

But he desperately hoped she wasn't.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

_author's note: OKay, only one more chapter to go! Thanks for everyone who has been reading and reviewing! _


	6. Promise

_author's note: alright, so this is the last chapter of this story. Thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed so far. Your comments are greatly appreciated. Well, here goes..._

_**Promise**_

_"Where's Cameron?" _

_He had been irrational, scared out of his mind. Both his mother and the strange man they'd just rescued were shouting at him to leave her behind, but he'd tried to push through. He wasn't really sure what he was going to do to help, only knew in his heart that somehow he had to help her. She wasn't just a machine…she was a girl…his only friend._

_Then he saw Vick hurl her out the back of the truck. She'd landed hard on the ground, trying to struggle to her hands and knees. She'd looked so fragile, so human. He'd tried to rush in her defense. Looking back, he was glad his mother had stopped him. He would have only gotten himself killed. Despite how frail she looked as she lay motionless on the concrete, with Vick raining down punches, he knew in his heart that Cameron didn't need protection. _

_But he'd die for her anyway._

John heard his mother and Derek talking in the kitchen when he entered the house with Cameron. His mom breathed a sigh of relief and John cast a glance over at the clock. _Yikes, no wonder she's worried._

"Where have you been?" Sarah demanded.

"Out," John said.

Derek scowled, glaring at Cameron. "With _it_?"

John's eyebrows narrowed and he slammed his fist down on the counter, startling both Derek and his mother. "Blast it, Derek! I'm sick of you riding me about this! Yes, I was out with Cameron. I was celebrating my birthday today since my actual birthday was a little traumatic. So, please, don't push me."

Derek cocked an eyebrow and glanced at Sarah. John didn't wait to hear what came next. He grabbed Cameron by the wrist and dragged her towards his room, sure his face was flushed with anger.

But he couldn't quite make it to his room. How would Derek respond to his outburst? He paused in the hallway on the other side of the kitchen, straining to hear what Derek was going to say to his mother. Instead, he heard Sarah start the conversation.

"Why can't he have a normal girlfriend?" she lamented out loud.

"He tried remember?" Derek pointed out gruffly. "You and Tin Miss scared her off."

"That was different," Sarah said indignantly.

Derek scoffed. "You can't be picky. You should have been happy that he actually found someone, instead of making him resort to some kind of fantasy."

Sarah sighed, rubbing her forehead tiredly. "What should I do?"

Derek shrugged. "You're the boss."

"Your boss is asking you for your advice," Sarah countered. "In your professional future-soldier opinion."

Derek simply shrugged in response. "I don't think you _can_ do anything. I mean, everything _I've_ tried isn't working. John's a sixteen year old boy whose cyborg bodyguard happens to be an incredibly beautiful teenage girl. He'll get over it. He's smart. Sooner or later, he'll see her for what she is."

In the hallway, John sat back against the wall, careful to remain unheard. At least his uncle hadn't gone off the wall like he'd imagined, lecturing Sarah about parenting or some such. It probably would have ended with someone getting buried in the backyard. He shifted his gaze to Cameron, who kept her eyes on the floor.

"Your mother's right," she began. "You need a real girl, John. A human girl."

"You _are_ real," John protested, grabbing her hand. "You have a personality, you have emotions. You're alive."

Cameron's snapped up to meet his, an urgency in her voice when she asked, "Where is Oz?"

The question caught him off guard, and at first he wasn't sure he'd heard her correctly. "What?"

"Oz," Cameron responded pointedly. "Where the Wonderful Wizard lives. The Tin Man was real. He was alive. He had a personality and emotions, but he didn't have a heart. I have to go to Oz."

John felt his own heart breaking with sorrow. "Cam…Oz is not a real place. You know what a fiction book is, right?"

On her face, he could almost see her hope deflating. "It's not real."

"It's not real," John repeated, mostly to himself. Staring at Cameron's face, he suddenly saw for the first time what true hopelessness was. And it _hurt _to see her that way. Isn't this what he prevented in the future? Hopelessness? He would supposedly bring hope to everyone in the resistance, but he couldn't help the one _person _who meant the most to him?

"But…" he started. "The wizard didn't give the Tin Man a heart. Do you remember that part? Do you remember what he told the Tin Man?"

"He already had one," Cameron said softly. John tried to hold back the tears. How could this be a machine? This was the Cameron he had seen crushed between two trucks, the Cameron who had cried, and begged and pleaded for her existence.

For her life.

_He _tried_ to shut out the sound of her pleading. His mother was right, just pull the chip, shut her down. It should have been simple. What was he waiting for? She begged, "Everything's fine, I'm fixed, I ran a test. I'm sorry for what I did, I'm sorry, but that wasn't me, you have to understand it wasn't me! You can't let this happen, John..."_

_He'd popped the cap, seeing the chip undeneath, which only increased her panicked cries. "John, please! Listen to me, I don't want to go! Please John, please!"_ She's fixed you moron!Let her go! No, she's tricking you!_ His mind was in a helpless conflict and he hesitated with his hand on the pliers, ready to yank the chip. Something was holding him back._

_Her tears were flowing freely as she continued shouting, pleading. Can Terminators cry? Uncle Bob couldn't. His mom shouted his name once more, in her commanding tone. John had shaken himself out of his thoughts and Cameron seemed to sense immediate termination._

"_I love you!" she shouted. Her words had stopped him cold, his breath catching in his throat. He didn't realize how much he'd been longing to hear those words. "I love you! I love you, John and you love me!" He had frozen, hand still gripping the pliers. She was right. He did love her. And that was why he had to do this. She wasn't fixed, he knew that much. He had to shut her down. Because if she really did love him as he loved her, she would rather die than harm him._

_He yanked the chip._

John eyes blurred with the memory. "My mom said it was a trick," he whispered in a hoarse voice. "What you said. It means something."

She understood exactly what he was talking about. "I know. You told me."

"She said you don't have feelings," John recited. "That you can't feel. That you don't know love."

Cameron was silent for a long, awkward moment. "Your mother is a very wise woman…" John felt deflated for about the tenth time that day.

"…but she is human," Cameron concluded. "She is incorrect sometimes, flawed. I was scared when I thought you were going to deactivate me. My inner programming was reawakened in the explosion and I felt emotions. I was not lying."

_I wasn't lying. I love you, John, and you love me! _

John let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Cameron was staring at him again, with that _look, _and…a small smile.

"I won't lie to you anymore," Cameron stated. "Will that make you happy?"

Yes.

Nothing had been a lie. This day. Her emotions. The kiss in the park. Her profession on his birthday…

"You were right," John said. Cameron cocked her head. "I do love you," he finished.

"Promise?" she asked.

John smiled tenderly and leaned over to kiss her, not even caring that Derek and his mother were still in the next room, that they could walk in at any given moment. He pulled back and looked into her shining eyes.

"Promise," he said.

She was more than just a machine, more than just his protector, he realized that now. No matter what his mother or Derek would say.

She was more than metal.

She was Cameron.

_Looking down at her motionless form lying in the bed of the car, he gently stroked her hand, hating himself for what he was about to do. But when he took the flare in his hand, ready to light it and watch Cameron's body burn to ashes...he knew he couldn't go through with it. He couldn't kill her._

_He looked up at his mother, who was watching him sadly, waiting. He shook his head slowly. "I'm sorry…"_

_He grabbed the chip and swiftly pushed it back into the port in Cameron's head. Both Sarah and Derek had let out a cry of alarm and Derek had taken a step forward, intending to stop John. John snatched up the gun and trained it on his uncle, eyes blazing with intensity. He wasn't going to let anyone touch Cameron. He would shoot if Derek came near._

_Sarah shoved Derek back, whirling on John, eyes wide with fear and disbelief. "John, she will kill you!"_

_John was aware of the fact that his gun was now trained on his mother. He wasn't sure if he would pull the trigger or not. "There's only one way to find out," he said in a low voice. He'd be dead without Cameron anyway. She saves his life. She was his only friend._

_He loved her._

_Cameron stirred and John moved the gun towards her, backing up a step. She sat up and slowly looked up at him. He felt his palms start to sweat and he changed his grip on the gun._

_"Are you here to kill me, John?" That had sent a chill down his back. The fact that he was the one holding the gun on her meant nothing. It wasn't as though he could stop her if she suddenly rose and lunged to kill him. The pistol wouldn't stop her; he wasn't foolish enough to believe that. _

_It was her words that spooked him, made him think. _Are you here to kill me, John?

"_Are you here to kill me?" he countered._

_There was a brief pause and she replied, "No." _

_She'd admitted it. She wasn't here to kill him. John felt a small flash of relief, and he lowered the gun slightly, though he knew this could merely be another trick. _

_Only one way to find out. He handed her his gun, his years of training screaming in protest. This is suicide! You're handing a gun to a Terminator programmed to kill you!_

"_Promise," he ordered her in a low voice. He could see the horror and fear in both his mother's and Derek's eyes. Cameron held the gun on him, eyes searching his, calculating. What was she determining? he wondered briefly. Would a head shot be best? John fidgeted nervously, but finally Cameron lowered the gun and handed it back to him. _

"_Promise," she said._

_John breathed a sigh of relief and reached out his hand._

_She took it. _

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

author's note: _well, that's the end. Let me know what you think!_


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